Do you like to cry? Do you like
to laugh? Would you prefer a “tear
jerker” movie, or would you like to see a film that will make you laugh? No one can force you to watch a particular
kind of movie. You just seem to
gravitate toward some more than others.
Why?
Noam Markovitch, Liat Netzer, and Maya Tamir (2017) sought to determine
what motivates us toward emotions of one valence (positive or negative) and
away from others. To do so, they
conducted three experiments in which disgusting, joyful, and emotionally
neutral images were presented to subjects who were allowed to decide whether to continue watching them or to discontinue. They also completed questionnaires regarding
their attitudes toward the emotions of disgust and joy.
One feature of the studies’ results, perhaps predictably, suggested
that people differ in their attitudes toward a given emotion. Some accept, for instance, that disgust and
joy are both natural features of life, and they are unlikely to expend much energy to structure their
lives to either experience or avoid those emotions. On the other hand, another feature of the
studies’ results was not so obvious.
Namely, some people restrict their lifestyles to avoid the possibility
of experiencing a particular emotion while others seek out experiences likely
to elicit the emotion. That is, one
might refuse to attend a movie due to expecting that it could include some
disgusting scene, however brief.
Taken to the extreme, those who avoid situations that might elicit an avoided emotion run the risk of sensitizing themselves even more to that emotion. In a sense, they become more “afraid” of
the emotion and more afraid of finding themselves in situations that could
leave them exposed to it. This can
result in a virtual phobia that need not have developed in the first place. The converse also is true. One might excessively seek situations that
evoke desired emotions. In that case,
the individual could become “addicted” to certain situations, as might be
true for some persons who love to be loved and become sexually promiscuous to
elicit loving behavior.
One other implication from the research is worth considering. Some people might have a negative attitude
toward a positive emotion. Think about
the individual who does not love to be loved.
That cynical person, for whatever misguided reason, could regard love as
a phony emotion in which he refuses to partake.
Believing that love is built on manipulation and deception, he would
avoid situations that could make him susceptible to “falling” in love. The more he avoids situations conducive to
loving interaction, the more convinced he becomes that love is an illusion.
Since our health is highly dependent on our emotional well-being and on
ways that emotion either facilitates or impedes healthful behaviors, there is
implicit useful advice in the experiments of Noam Markovitch and his
colleagues. We should consider our
attitudes toward our emotions—all of them, the positive and the negative. Emotions are signals that alert us to situations
that are helpful and harmful. We all
experience virtually all the emotions to some degree whether we are conscious of them or not. Try to be aware of the emotions that you seek
and those that you avoid. Use that awareness
to be sure that you are not cutting yourself off from situations that might involve
some small amount of negative emotion that you must endure to reap a greater amount of positive emotion. For
instance, although all human relationships involve painful experiences, most
have the potential for considerably greater joy.
And, by the way, both a good cry and a good laugh can be salutary.
Reference:
Markovitch, N., Netzer, L.,
& Tamir, M. (2017). What You Like Is
What You Try to Get: Attitudes Toward Emotions and Situation Selection. Emotion, January. No Pagination Specified.
http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/emo0000272
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