This Too Shall Pass

Some trying circumstances seem interminable.  Many varieties of experience can evoke that feeling.  You, for example, could be unemployed, at war with your spouse, or be unable to lose weight no matter how hard you try.  Everyone at some time suffers an unfortunate circumstance that they feel never will end.  But could some people be more vulnerable to perceiving a trial as never-ending?

Emma Bruehlman-Senecal, Özlem Ayduk, and Oliver P. John (2016) investigated trying circumstances in terms of “temporal distancing” which, as you might guess, refers to framing upsetting experiences within a long-distance context.   For instance, an unemployed temporal distancer would be a person who, knowing that she has a good previous work record, is highly qualified, and is determined to do all necessary to find a job, sincerely believes that gainful employment is just a matter of time.

As expected, the investigators found that persons high in temporal distancing not only regarded their unfortunate circumstances as time-limited, but they also understood their negative thoughts and emotions in the same time-limited fashion.  Accordingly, the negatives “stung” less.  Moreover, consistent with their greater hopefulness, high temporal distancers experienced greater confidence in their abilities to actively problem solve and to manage their challenging emotions.

Given that trying circumstances are a common feature of our existence, no one would be surprised to learn that high temporal distancers evaluated their lives as more satisfying than did low temporal distancers.  And, almost by definition, the former worried less than the latter.

You might be thinking, “When stressed out, taking a long view is easier said than done,” and I heartily agree.  That is why with this research, as with all research and professional advice, you must filter its implications through the colander of your ego strength—your history, temperament, personality, and environments.  When confronted with past stressors, when and why were you able or unable to adopt a long-view?  What elements of your temperament (e.g., frustration tolerance) were assets or liabilities during that time?  Which features of your personality (e.g., openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, or neuroticism) played a part? And, finally, what environments (natural, fabricated, or interpersonal) helped or hindered?

By scrutinizing your ego strength and learning from your worst and best experiences you will be able to put stressors into perspective, not only time-wise but in many other ways, such as by knowing which specific strategies have worked and will work for you.  You also must strive to problem solve and to manage your emotions.  Those skills, too, will profit from whatever ego strength insight you can manage and from your intelligent application of the insights.  

Reference

Bruehlman-Senecal, Emma; Ayduk, Özlem; John, Oliver P.  (2016).  Taking the Long View: Implications of Individual Differences in Temporal Distancing for Affect, Stress Reactivity, and Well-Being.  Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, July 11, No Pagination Specified. http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/pspp0000103.